I think I'm finally ready

Yesterday my last week at work started. I’ve been terrified of that moment, to be perfectly honest. It has definitely not been my dream job but the idea of it ending, of all of this ending, has been taking my breath away for weeks now. Then as I was working on some assignments I started receiving emails from my university about classes and schedules and all that administrational stuff and at first, I panicked. I realised that in two weeks time I will be back there; on the other side of the sea. In two weeks, this will not be my life anymore and it will never be exactly like this again.

That was my initial response. However, as I got to thinking about it more and more I realised that maybe I am ready for it. I am ready to move on. I have done and seen a great deal here and I will be forever grateful for that, but this was never going to be permanent and this was never going to be my life in the future.

Right now, I’m not sure if I’m ready with the UK just yet. This country has for some unknown reason stolen my heart completely and if I get the chance I will surely return. But that time isn’t here yet. First, I have some business left in the Netherlands. I will go to another country next year, I will finish my degree. I may not be ready with the UK yet but I am ready to move on with my life and to see what more it’s got in store for me.

So, I am ready for now to say goodbye. I am ready to go back to the Netherlands, but forward with my life. And instead of worrying about whether I will ever return or whether I will ever be as happy again, I will just have faith and try my best with what I get. The future isn’t set in stone just yet; so bring it on!