Saying my goodbyes
- leauwe
- Feb 1, 2017
- 2 min read

Last Friday I was on my way to work for my last day of my internship. I’d been feeling ill all week but as I was so close to finishing I kept powering through. Because of my impending cold I’d been kind of forgetting to worry about the fact that I almost had to leave. The week before it’d been pretty much all I could think of but that week I found myself occupied with surviving more than coping.
That morning I conveniently missed the bus for the third day in a row as it has this new habit of showing up several minutes too early. While I was annoyed with this I was also reasonably okay because I have a great pick me up whenever it happens. There’s this woman who takes either the bus before mine or the bus after mine each morning which means that we have gotten into the habit of only seeing each other when either of us misses our bus. Needless to say our conversations generally remain limited to complaints about the public transport in our town and the occasional remark about the weather being too cold or, more often, too wet.
So, like I said: I was annoyed but I also knew that I’d be able to vent my frustrations to her and that it would give me the opportunity to say goodbye, which it did. What I didn’t expect is how difficult that was. I hardly knew her name, but over the last six months she has been one of those constants in my life that just make things a little bit better, a little bit more comfortable. And I realised that I would miss her.
It wasn’t until that moment that it occurred to me exactly how much goodbyes I would have to say. Not just to the friends I’ve made but also to all the new habits I’ve picked up and the places I see every single day. It is heartbreaking to say goodbye to friends but for me it feels even more devastating to say goodbye to an entire life; especially a good one.
When I left home I was upset about leaving everyone behind but I also knew that I’d be coming back. This time around, things are different. I will never get this life back. So, to end my time abroad I will say this as a final advice for future adventurers: it will be scary and maybe a bit sad to leave everything behind and go abroad, but I can tell you that it will be even scarier and sadder when it ends and you have to go back home. And yet, with all that scariness and sadness, it is still a 100% worth it. Go do it.
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